Hot Topic Dirty jokes,Adult jokes,Sexy jokes,Funny jokes

[Asit.sexy]

1.Bhikhari Train me hath me x-ray liye bhikh mang raha tha,
I admi chillaya: Harami, Tu wohi hai na, Jo Gaand ka x-ray dikha ke bolta hai mere DIL me ched hai..

2.17 yrs boy ko ** case me pakda jane par:
Court me Lawyer(Boy ka Lu#d pakde hue): "your honour, is chhote se bachche ko dekho kya ye ** kar sakta hai?"
Boy to lawyer: "Itna na hila, nahin to case haar jayenge!!

3.Pati-Jaan aj Mood Ho raha hai...
Wife-Na Aaj Nahi
Pati-Aa jao Yaar
Wife-Nahi
Son-papa ** kar lo Ya Mutth Mar Ke So Jao
Bakchodi mat karo,Subah school jana hai!

[Asit.sexy]

Aurat- Do TARAH ki Goli DENA
Ek To 2 MAHINEY Tak Pregnancy Na Ho aur Ek 2 MAHINE Tak Bilkul KHADA Na Ho
Chemist- aisa kyu?
Aurat-Kyonki main 2 MAHINE Ke LIYE Gaon JA Rahi HU.


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Ladki job ke liye interview dene gayi
Boss: Woh kya hai jis ke 2 wheel hote hai?
GIRL: Motor Cycle
Boss: nahi, Honda Motor Cycle
BOSS: woh kya hai jis ke 4 wheel hote hain?
Girl: Car
BOSS: No, Toyota car.
Girl gusse se: "ab mere sawaal ka jawaab do
"Aagey bhi baal peeche bhi baal beech mein Suraakh ?"
BOSS: "choot" ?
Girl: "NAHI TERI MAA KI CHOOT" !



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[Asit.sexy]

Boy to girl: How much calcium is there in women’s Breasts?
Girl: I don’t have any idea but it has enough calcium to help a Man’s boneless thing to standup!
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“Prostitution is the only industry where fresh employees are paid more than the experienced ones”.

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What Is The Difference Between Sky And Skirt.?
Sky Covers The Whole Universe..

Skirt Covers The Universal “HOLE”..!
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What is the similarity between a girl & petrol?
1. Both are explosive
2. Both are hot
3. Both are dangerous when kept in open…

[Asit.sexy]

Bikini is a dress where 90% of the woman body is exposed..
but men are very decent.
they dont look at that 90%
they look only at the covered 10%.


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Condom talking to Whisper : Dear, Every month you stop my business for one week
Whisper says : Yes ,but if you make a mistake for one time, I’ll loose my business for “Nine” months…..



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A man married a Lady Traffic police ....
His Friend: How was your wedding night?
Man: She charged Rs 200 for Over speed,
400 for wrong side entry and Rs 800 for not wearing helmet

[Asit.sexy]

A man was sitting in bus, his elbow touched a woman's breast.
They are both quite startled.
The man turns to woman and says, ‘Madam, if your heart is as soft as your breast,
I know you’ll forgive me.’
She replies, ‘If your penis is as much hard as your elbow, I’m in room 112.


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One Leg of a woman talking the other leg about unity:
United We Are Saved,
Divided We Are Fucked…..!!!
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If boy is in love
His parents will say
Idiot,who is that girl?

If girl is in love
Her parents will say
Who is that idiot?

Moral of the story -In love stories, no matter who is in love BOYS are always idiot!

[Asit.sexy]

A newly married girl got first class in her B.Ed examination.Her husband wrote a letter to her parents” Your girl is First Class in Bed”!


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Question: What’s the difference between cricketers and condoms?
Answer: Cricketers drop the catches and condoms catch the drops.



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Advantages of breast milk.....
1: Cat can’t steal it.
2: No need to boil.
3: Available in attractive containers.
4: One is Free with another
5: Popular in all age group
6: No Expiry date
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[Asit.sexy]

Ek Anokha Lekin Kadva Sach
Is duniya me har kisi ka alag alag naam hota hai ,
Fir bhi bheed Me agar koi awaaj lagaye, “Abe Chutiye”
To 10 Me se 9 log palat kar Jarur dekhte hai….
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A naked lady goes to Banta's bar, asks for a peg. Banta stares at her. Lady said, "Never seen a nude woman?"
Banta replied, "Nahi main soch raha hoon, tu paise kaha se nikalegi."

[Asit.sexy]

Santa: I got old age pension by showing grey hair on my chest.
Jeeto: Pant ki zip khol ke dikha dete to Disability Allowance bhi mil jaata

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A Couple Was Kissing In the Garden.... Suddenly a Dog and a Bitch Started Fucking...
Boy: Janu Mera Bhi Dil Kerta Hai ki Main Bhi Kar Loon
Girl : Ok, Par Sambhal Kar.... Kutiya Kaat Na Le

[Asit.sexy]

Nasbandi ki team ko dubara apne gaon me dekh kar ek budha bola, "In logo ne connection to pahle hi kat diya tha,ab kya HANDSET bhi le jayenge?


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Pilot to control tower:"i'm 300 miles from land,600 feet over water & no fuel,please instruct."??????????
Control Tower to pilot:"Gaaaand marao!!!"

[Asit.sexy]

Degrees Of Girls.....
BA – Beautifull Ass
LLB – Lovely Lickable Breasts
BSc – Beautiful Sexy Cunt
MBBS – Member Of Big Boobs Society
MBA – Married But Available



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Aaj maine 2 kasme khai hai...
1) Parai ladki pe nazar nahi dalunga.
2) Kisi bhi ladki ko paraai nahi manungaa!